Friday, January 28, 2011

I WILL make friends! and other current events.

This week I did something very brave. It stemmed from the fact that I'm tired of not having medical school friends.

So, I INVITED MYSELF TO 'HANG OUT' with two wives from school. They both have babies. One has two (one that's only a month old!) and the other has one. They always go to each other's homes and just chill while their husbands study. Can you smell my jealousy?

In less than an hour I will be heading over to one of their homes and watching HGTV or playing with their babies, or making cookies, or just chatting, or whatever else they do when they 'hang out'.

I just hope I don't seem as awkward as I feel.

In other news... I haven't written in a while. I've wanted to. I just don't know what to say. It hasn't been a FABULOUS few months. It also hasn't been AWFUL. We've just been taking it one day at a time. One early morning at a time, one test at a time, and so on.

Taking it one day at a time has its advantages and disadvantages. The days go very slowly - that's a disadvantage. And I often think, 'can I really do this every single day for 3.5 more years? And then for how many more years after that?'

Some days I think, 'if I have to cook one more dinner, do one more load of smelly laundry, load one more dishwasher, after a long day I am going to S.C.R.E.A.M.'

But some days I think, 'we are really lucky - we are healthy, we live in the same house, we get to see each other every day, we have the potential to SOMEDAY be financially stable....' The blessings go on and on.

So far, I would describe the medical school experience as a rocky, hilly marathon - one that starts at sea level and ends on Everest - and takes 5 years to finish (including applying).

There are definitely ups and downs. I would have said roller coaster, but roller coasters go fast. This doesn't. (so far....)


Lauren said...

This time does pass. It does. And time does start to move more quickly. As someone who is 112 days from watching her husband end the 4(5) year marathon called medical school, I can assure you that it will pass by quicker than you think.

I printed the 4 year plan for my husband's class when he was in his MS1 year (it was on the school's website). I remember crossing off Orientation and looking at everything ahead and thinking, "Oh my God. It's never going to end. Ever."

I remember the frustration with his lack of availability because he was always studying, always stressing, always trying so hard (and sometimes not getting the best results regardless), and watching his disappointment and thinking- really? Can we do this?

But now we are 112 days away and I cannot believe it. You ARE doing it the right way, though it may seem long. There is no better way to do this than taking it one day at a time. One day, one test, one week, one month, one semester, one year at a time. And then one day you look up and it's almost over (then, of course, comes residency, but no sense in borrowing worries meant for another time).

Take it one day at a time, and go out and brave the awkward situations in order to make friends. Making friends and keeping yourself busy makes the one day at a time strategy move much more quickly!

And if you can find it- print the 4 year plan. I have relished crossing off each semester/rotation (for 3rd and 4th years). It brings it large sense of satisfaction- like we ARE getting through this, slowly but surely.

Drew said...

The time passes and while it may seem slow right now medical school was like a steamroller. It was VERY slow going in the beginning and then you get to rotations and things pick up. Then 4th year comes along and on top of rotations you have interviews and/or away rotations. The time flies because you're both too busy to look at a calender or watch. Next thing you know, match arrives and you start planning your next 3-4 years.

Having friends who are where in the same place as you will help immensely. Especially during the exam intensive years and residency. No one can truly understand the life of a medical student or resident i they haven't already been down that road. I hope you end up having a good time with the other wives!

It was very hard for me to find friends within Dr. J's medical class but I did come away with a couple and it helped sometimes to have someone to talk to who knew exactly where you were coming from.

Also, I sucked (and still suck) at taking things one day at a time. My new mantra is "It won't be like this forever" I use it oh, about 100x's a day!

Katie said...

I hope you know how inspiring your guys' story is. Seriously, every time I read your updates I think, "wow, things might be hard, but they sure know how to work together to make challenges enjoyable." I always hope that some day I'll be able to grow up and be just as poised, hard working, and faithful.

You go, girl! I wish I could fully empathize, but I think your day-to-day tactic is just perfect. You'll get there, all the while being a great example to those of us who have yet to face that kind of adversity. Just think, one day you'll look back and you'll see all the incredible growth.

Sorry, I'm ranting, I just really admire you. That's all.

PS. Congrats on all you have accomplished so far. It's awesome!

Red Stethoscope said...

Good luck with the new girls! I'm sure you will all get along great! Bonus: cute babies to play with.

Also, I will be one of your internet friends (referring to your last post), but I don't know what category I fall Maybe "used to be friendly and outgoing girl that is everybody's friend until med. school zapped her energy and now she will CUT YOU if you interfere with her coffee?" Pleasant, I know. :)

Anonymous said...

Good for you for putting yourself out there!!! I did that last year with a book club and I am SO GLAD I did it. Hopefully it went really well!

And yes, I know what you mean about "can I really do this for X more years?" It's a recurring feeling. But there are many more peaks than valleys!

from head 2 toe said...

Glad I found this blog! Nice work putting yourself out there! It's true, it is nice you get to see each other everyday! My husband is on clerkships right now...still so greatful he isn't in Iraq or anything, but it's tough! I would love if you check out our blog!